James asks…

Poll: Are you sick off goody two shoes self improvement goals?

Why is it we’re all supposed to vow to give to charity, drink less, take an academic course, etc?

I suggest some subversive lifetime achievement goals. Before i die I am going to:

a) Punch the pope

b) Ram raid a bank

c) Streak at a major sporting event

d) Tell everyone what I really think of them

e) Con somebody into sleeping with me who wouldn’t normally want to

f) Get so drunk/ stoned I lose the power of speech at least once a month

g) Mock disabled kids

h) Dance at the funeral of somebody I hated

i) Gain a large some of money by illegal means and get away with it

j) Gain a stone through eating junk

k) Make at least one prank phone call a week

l) Make somebody cry at least once a week

m) Get deported from at least one country for offending their culture

n) Do the bare minimum, or less, at any job I have until fired

o) Force an old person to give up a seat on the bus for me

p) Break the windows at the house of commons

q) Ruin a priceless work of art by smearing it with my poo

r) Use my car to make ridiculously short trips to annoy green types

s) Stand on the side of a public swimming pool and pee into it. Yell “Come on, everybody’s doing it, I’m just not trying to hide it!”

t) Make a whole species extinct single handedly

u) Buy a slave. Make them do degrading things. Sell them on.

v) Run my own sweat shop of illegal immigrants. Shop them to immigration when I’ve made my first million.

w) Get a job at the samaritans. Convince callers to top themselves.

x) Spend more time on Yahoo Answers than any other living person. Even if that means killing some of the oposition.

y) Swim with a dolphin. Shag it, then kill and eat it.

z) Destabilise an emerging nation so that it descends back into a viscious cycle of genocide, famine and despair.

Vote for your favourite, or add your own.

MKWeb answers:

YES ..
I choose x)

ps. You`re my hero ….

Carol asks…

Question about non-fiction, self-improvement, success, or goals books?

All of them seem to assume that the reader is already a manager, a boss, an important person at work.
Since I don’t have any employees, and since i’m not a boss, should i stop reading these books and find another way to succeed?

Why are these books always assuming that I’m already bill gates or Jack Welch?? If i was already sitting in a corner office, why the f*** would i need to read a book about success? 🙁

MKWeb answers:

NO! Don’t ever stop reading books that separate you from ‘the pack’ and make you more valuable. Bringing value to the marketplace is one of the main keys to success. Maybe you just need to read different books. Try ‘Personal Development for Smart People’ by Steve Pavlina, or one of my favorites – ‘The Slight Edge’ by Jeff Olson. Also, Randy Gage and Jim Rohn have great collections of material as well.

Laura asks…

Goals can you give me one of each please?

what are some of your personal goals, career goals, recreational goals, material goals, self improvement goals, charity goals, and spiritual goal.

MKWeb answers:

My goal is to get enough points on Yahoo so that I can ask more question each day. – smiles (I love asking questions)

David asks…

I need help with my own self-improvement.?

I have officially decided that its time to revamp my image and my capabilities, and I’m tired of being mediocre at everything. I cannot tell if this is an identity crisis or the fact that I simply haven’t been able to truly realize that perhaps I just don’t understand the order of things. I’m afraid that I dream of big things and great accomplishments but am cursed with none of the abilities necessary to do them.

I started at football in High School, yet I was always jealous and disheartened by those who had the natural physique and skill to be college worthy. It just made me angry that in the grand scheme of things that some kid, not due to any work ethic or greatness of his character, was blessed with the genes that allowed him run faster than me and lift more than I could.

In academics, I was always frustrated that I simply was too bored, too angry, and too lazy to excel in the high school education system. I was again jealous of those who, though lacking in physical capability or social skills, had in my opinion a set life ahead of them just with their raw intelligence and academic work ethic. I always felt as though if I possessed that kind of intelligence, my goals would be clear cut and the direction of my life simple.

Socially, I do not charismatically take over my situation.
I have a fairly difficult time small talking, and I’m in no way getting the joys that I see so many of the socialite pretty boys at my school enjoying, particularly the attractive women. I could never manipulate others or convince people to follow me.

Now High School is ending, and I get a fresh start in college. What should I do, work on my weaknesses or fortify my strengths? Should I tone down my own selfimprovement rhetoric? and just accept that maybe I’m just a mediocre person destined for mediocre things? Or am I fine, and merely just need a change in environment?

Anyways, I’m going to college on an ROTC scholarship, so I’m going to be in the military. Perhaps this is my avenue for excellence. So perhaps merely recommendations for success in college or military is all I need.

MKWeb answers:

Aight Slick here’s the deal, I’m graduating college in the ROTC program, I’m about to be a 2LT, hence my nickname. Youre issue here is clearly self-confidence. How I got past this a LONG time ago was I forced it aside and made myself do something that was completely outlandish. It doesn’t matter what it is. It could be as small as walking up to one of the hot chicks and start talking, it could be something as big as throwing Youre own party or running through your school ass-naked. That might get your cadre a bit pissed(they’ll laugh their asses off after you’ve left the office because they’ll think its funny as hell, in a good way) at you, but it will get you noticed and it will kill your lack of self-confidence on the spot. Go to the gym, workout more, go running. Improve your body however you want to, hit the books, learn to do something. I’ll tell you this the longer you sit on the internet thinking about this and avoid getting your name out in public, the longer and harder its going to be to actually get up and do something about it.

Chances are you are already a really chill guy… You just don’t know it yet.

Remember this, you’ll never be able to lead soldiers unless you can lead yourself first.

You wanna know what really ruins someones college experience? College itself. ROTC takes up no time compared to classes and homework.

To Nick:

Nick I’m sorry but how would you know about any brainwashing if you’ve never even been in/around the program. The opinion of one person who quit isnt really a basis for any manner of intelligent conclusion. Non-ROTC college kids think the military brainwashes people just like high-school dropouts think that college brainwashes college students. Think about it Nick, you have no factual basis for squat.

The only thing that gets people is if they don’t pay attention to the contract they sign. Its the same as if you were signing a contract for insurance, a house, a car, etc. You wouldnt sign any of those without reading the fine print either. And if you do, its your own fault if you get screwed.

“The only thing that ROTC will lead to is death.” Really? How about the hundreds of thousands of retired officers who are currently in another career/enjoying retirement. There are more homicides in Washington D.C. Annually then there are military deaths in 5 Afganistans.

Susan asks…

Looking for the title of a self improvement book bought many years ago..?

It was this small paperback book regarding how to get anything you want in life. I think the title was something like..” How to get whatever you want” or ” The secret to getting anything you want in life”..anyway I really want to read it again. It basically said that as long as you were willing to do whatever it takes ( and I mean whatever it takes! ) you can reach your goal although, most times you didn’t need to do everything on that list. Is this ringing any bells with anyone? If so, please give me the title or author so I can get another copy. Thank you sooo much.

MKWeb answers:

“How To Get Whatever You Want” by MR Kopmeyer [published in 1972]

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