Mandy asks…

Self Esteem worksheet – what kinds of things can one list?

A self esteem worksheet has two sides.
One side asks to list boosters: actions/thoughts/ways that improve self esteem
and the other, busters: that lower it.

Can anyone give examples of any?

Also many people feel that their “busters” are triggered by other people’s comments…what sorts of busters do people do to lower their own self esteem?


MKWeb answers:

I can understand why you are finding it difficult to think through, as this way of learning to understand what goes on for you can be hard- as it is so personal, and everyone is different. Knowing what other people might say could help, but ultimately you will need to appreciate your own personal experience.

You may find it easier to think about it in this way-think back to a time when you know you felt low, lacking in energy, and feeling bad towards yourself. Your life wasn’t going well, you crititized yourself a lot, you felt blank and isolated from other people.
Then think about times when you felt relaxed and natural, happy in your own body, and confident to be out there in the world with others.

See what comes out of thinking about this. If you draw a blank, that’s becuase it’s very hard to remember how you felt and thought at the time, looking back. So what you need to do is to start noticing what’s going on in the here and now. These kind of work sheets are better to use not on past situations, but on what happened today, this week.

The idea is to start noticing what happens in your life day to day, so that you can think things through rather than just reacting and getting sucked into emotional stuff without counting to 10.

The worksheet is suggesting that you start to think through what is helpful, and what is unhelpful, in your daily life. You don’t have to use a worksheet to do this- you could take a step back from your daily struggles once a day for a few minutes, just to become more conscious rather than just going through your days automatically doing things.

Chris asks…

where can i get free self help books to download?

im looking for self help books and worksheets on trust, child abuse recovery, coping with flashbacks, self esteem, relationships, boundaries etc….. i can’t afford to buy any and i would like to be able to download them instead of getting them from the internet that way i can save them and be able to go back to them at any time.

MKWeb answers:

If the author of the books you want is ok with you downloading them, they will be on his website.

If not, that means the author is not willing to let you have them for free.

I suggest you use the public library.

Betty asks…

Where can I find some good worksheets to use during therapy session with my clients.?

I am looking for all types of worksheets such as anger management, self esteem, and depression; just to name a few.
I am looking for all types of worksheets such as anger management, self estee m, and depression; just to name a few.

I don’t really like to use worksheets with my clients but I do have some clients who ask me for worksheets

MKWeb answers:…/self-esteem-worksheets.html

Maria asks…

what are the best websites to look for building self-esteem/self-confidence?

ie. motivational
ie. affirmations
ie. quotes
ie. prayers
ie. worksheets

MKWeb answers:

Check out Michael Neill’s site – he has a weekly newsletter and daily tips which are always worth reading, for their wisdom & simplicity

Carol asks…


Fill in the blanks with positive statements the person could have said to himself or herself which would increase feelings of self-worth:

4) Bill started a new school and some of the guys made fun of the way he looks. He feels unpopular and worthless. What could he say to himself?

5) Word got out around school that Erin was sexually active with lots of guys. She feels that people view her as a slut. What could she say to herself?

6) Shiro’s best friend found out that Shiro is gay and won’t talk to him. Shiro feels worthless and different. What could he say to himself?

7) Rick’s teacher caught him cheating on a test and sent him to the office. Rick feels real crummy about himself. What could he say to himself?

8) Josh’s teacher called him a worthless piece of trash when he talked back to her in class. What could he say to himself?

9) After Carol got an A on her biology test a guy in Carol’s class called her a teacher’s pet and only got the grade cause the teacher has a thing for her. What can she say to herself?

10) Carl just said something really silly to a girl he likes. He feels like a total fool. What can he say to himself?

MKWeb answers:

You’ll get no self esteem if you keep having people do things for you instead of you doing them for yourself.

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