Chris asks…

What is your definition of self confidence?

And are you shy, quite or reserved, etc?
or are you confident, loud, bold or a person who adores attention?

thank you for your answers. ( :

MKWeb answers:

I’m a rather reserved person. I really don’t know why =)

But I am confident when I’m amongst other confident people.

I believe a self-confident person sees through a two lenses: one of their good qualities and attributes (brain, skills, etc), the other of their areas that need improvement.

I can say confidently that I’m a culturally-aware person, however, I need to be more articulate.

A confident person is seldom jealous or a copy-cat.

Michael asks…

what is your definition of self confidence?

MKWeb answers:

Knowing when you’re right in what you’re doing or saying

Susan asks…

what is the definition and explaination of self confidence?

MKWeb answers:

I like pathfinder’s answer. Self-confidence means to me specificially:

I feel good about myself. I feel proud of my accomplishments. I am not ashamed of my failures. I like my body. I like my mind and soul. I am proud of my talents. I enjoy sharing my strengths with others. Walking with my head up, and not staring at the ground. Having a positive attitude on most things in life. To walk away from a rejection with a determination to try again.

Sandy asks…

How can I gain self confidence.?

I do not believe I have self confidence when it comes to interacting with others.When I am alone,I speak,I speak so clearly.I think and allow myself to give time to think in order to response correctly.
When I am around others I shut down,my mind becomes blank.I tend to react differently,If I am around some one that talks nonsense,I talk nonsense.
Should I first study the definition of gaining self confidence.Maybe, I am this way become I am isolated and young and rarely interact.

Being social isn’t always easy..
Haha, my actual hair isn’t green.But hey! It’s an internet avatar,perhaps pink will float your boat,eh.

=)

MKWeb answers:

In your case, confidence is strictly tied to how you perceive yourself. You say “When I am alone,I speak,I speak so clearly.I think and allow myself to give time to think in order to response correctly.” This accentuates the fact that you are aware that you’re more capable when you’re alone. Automatically, this also shows that you’re afraid of not disappointing the people in your environment. You’re aware of your abilities and of your high level of comprehension, but you’re also aware of the fact that this level decreases considerably in social situations.

The main problem is that you put too much emphasis on the fact that your skills cannot be manifested properly in social interaction. You focus more than it is needed on how you evaluate yourself in society. Judging from how you describe yourself, every interaction with society that you go through is probably like a test to you.
I’d say you should try to put less accent on the opinions that surround you and more accent on what you know you’re capable of. You need to become more aware of your self and your value. You seem to think that just because you fail to express yourself properly and manifest your skills in social situations, this means you’re less valuable.

The way you show yourself can change the surrounding opinions, but keep in mind that ‘show’ is the key term in this situation. You tend to think less of yourself when you fail to determine people to acknowledge your true level and your true persona.

“When I am alone,I speak,I speak so clearly” – This is the point. The only point that truly matters. The fact that you can. You know you bear certain abilities, you know your skills, regardless of the fact that others don’t. Even if they’re not exposed or openly acknowledge, your skills remain untouched by flaws, they’re still there.

The main problem is that you give too much importance to outer opinions. People who focus on outer opinions like you tend to see things and see their selves through the eyes of the other people. Evaluating yourself through the perspective of someone else can be destructive. Basically, you are aware of the self/side of you that you show to people. Knowing that you don’t show them what you’re capable of, you tend to assume they think less of you. You think they’re not aware of those skills, so you just evaluate yourself through their opinion. But you forget that the skills are still there. They’re just hidden. Not exposing them doesn’t decrease your value.

John asks…

can you elaborate on self confidence?(especially for girls)?

I know self confidence is a trait that girls find attractive in a guy. I know the definition of self confidence. But I would like to know how that applies in the dating scene. What traits of self confidence do you want to see in a guy you date?

for ex. being bold to ask you out.

MKWeb answers:

One that talks and then listens to you and has some sort of family values, and respect for you and yur feelings,

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